After 3 months of arduous study, I spent 3 days with the most amazing, authentic, transparent and honest group of people with whom I have ever had the honor to interact.  It is difficult to put into words what my heart is aching to say.

To an outsider, we may very well have looked like a gang of ragamuffins.  As a group, we were younger, older, faddish, classic, tattooed, pierced, dress pants, flip flops, floppy hats, skinny jeans, warm-ups, shorts, straight, LGBT, Midwesterners, Eastern Coast, Western Coast, Southerners, Pacific North Westerners, Plainsmen, Australians, married, single, mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, varying religious and denominational backgrounds, different skin colors and heritages and the list goes on.  But despite the richness differences can bring to any conversation, I found that foundationally, at our cores beings, as humans, we have much more in common than not.

While I dare not speak for anyone else, on any topic, a few things I found to be true include, but are not limited to, the following: It is frightening to be vulnerable.  It is daunting to expose our flaws.  Love is generally easy to give, yet it is ever so difficult to receive.  Broken hearts abound and the only difference between a shattered heart and a broken heart is the person experiencing the pain.  Family is of utmost importance, whether the relationships are intact or not.  Familial DNA often fails us.  We deeply love people who cannot, will not or do not love us in return.  Everyone has secrets and keeping those secrets hidden leads to shame.  There is a vast difference between who we are and who we pretend to be.  Outer appearances are not always an accurate reflection of inner dynamics.

Inner self talk left unaddressed, generally defaults to the negative.  Being unprepared for self-care is to be selfish and dangerous.  Organization goes beyond our closets and our lives to our relationships with others and our community.  In being open and gracious, our hearts are expanded.  Broken trust affects us in innumerable ways, for longer periods of time than we realize.  The action of “becoming” is not so much an adding to, as it is a chipping away.  Wearing masks is a tiring, abusive practice; and through intentionally abandoning those masks, it is actually possible to be loved and accepted as we are.  Not only can the older bring wisdom to the younger, but the younger can bring wisdom to the older.  Forgiveness, even though completely given, does not extinguish the pain.  The cost of success can at times be high, but the cost of failure is often times insurmountable.  The failure to launch can and often does take a toll in human life.  While some biological parents abandon their children, many do not.  And when those biological parents do abandon their children, God brings in a surrogate, whose love reigns down as manna from heaven.  It is never the wrong time to do the right thing.  Sometimes bridges need to be built, sometimes they need repairing and still others need to be burned.  As adults we have the opportunity and the permission to begin a new story for the rest of our lives, keeping what is good and letting go of what is not.  It is rare to see God’s purpose completely in the beginning of a journey, but the further along the journey one goes the more clearly we can see God.  There is a difference in being chosen and being invited.  The more you get to know an individual, the more beauty you find in them.  It is okay, to be not okay.  Not all wounded people have a tendency toward wounding others; for some, wounds increase the human ability to exude grace and love.  Finally, there is no difference greater than the sameness of God’s love.

A person does not have to be directly and personally affected by a cause to champion it; but if you are, the power of your story cannot be overstated.  The stories and lives of these courageous people who have been rejected by their families, their church communities, their neighbors, their friends and often times complete strangers, yet retained hearts overflowing with love, seemed on the surface to be an oxymoron of gigantic proportions.  But just as sure as the sun will rise in the East and set in the West, these people are real.  They are flesh and blood and have hearts that reflect Christ more accurately than most church sanctuaries on Sunday morning.

So as the introduction to our new lives has come to a completion, we each head out today to bring back to our communities the things we learned and experienced.  Which is to speak the knowledge and truth of Christ’s love for everyone to the powerful beast of exclusion.  If we remain diligent, in time, every chain will be broken and the beast we be defeated.  God be with us!

First, let’s get right down to the ugly truth no one wants to talk about.  Marriage is a LEGAL status.  It is not a RELIGIOUS status.  You can get married without the church, without a pastor, without a prayer, but you cannot get married without filing paperwork with the appropriate legal agencies.  In fact, until you file with the proper legal agencies, your marriage is not valid, even if you have had the most extravagant wedding imaginable.  So bottom line marriage is a LEGAL status.

But having said that, I believe marriage is sacred.  Some would argue marriage is a sacrament.  Indeed, marriage is a union which was created by God, and can most certainly be blessed by God.

So what did God have in mind when he created marriage?  Scripture tells us several things that should be considered:

1. It is not good for humans to be alone
2. Procreation
3. Companionship
4. Kinship
5. Support, etc.

But the foundational reason God created marriage, is the very same reason he created everything else.  For His Glory.  God created marriage and I suspect he said It Is Good.

The question that must be answered is can a same sex marriage glorify and honor God.  My belief is the answer is a resounding YES.

The primary argument I have heard from many Christians explaining their unwillingness to support same-sex marriage is directly related to the ideology that a marriage is supposed to be a reflection of, Christ as the groom and the church as the bride.  I could not agree with that proposition more heartily.  In fact, that is the VERY reason I believe same sex marriages can be and are God honoring.

The pill in the jam which is often overlooked is relationships between married individuals and the relationship between Christ and the Church is not entirely symmetrical.  People focus too much on the usage of the words “groom and bride” as it is found in scripture.  Many people are unwilling to admit that not only is the Bible filled with truth it is filled with symbolism, i.e. faith like a mustard seed, holy communion, all the parables told by Jesus, etc.    In light of often used symbolism it seems perfectly reasonable to believe the wording GROOM and BRIDE are symbolic as well.  Additionally, the greater weight of the evidence, implies this symbolism DOES NOT suggest, much less support, that these words were chosen to enforce or mandate opposite sex relationships.  If a person digs a little deeper than a cursory reading of scripture it is easy to see that these scriptures are not sexual in nature at all.

Primarily, a marriage should embody and reflect the same FAITHFULNESS between two people as Christ has for the church.

The same deepening love Christ has for the church.  The same exclusivity Christ has for the church.  The same delight Christ has for the church.  The same sacrificial behavior Christ has for the church.  The same deep desire for unity Christ has for the church.  The same selflessness Christ has for the church.  This is how two married individuals are a reflection of Christ and his relationship to the church.

When a marriage consists of two individuals who are bound together, who resist the human nature of excess and self-centered desire, and resist behaviors that shame or degrade the other, a marriage, regardless of the gender of the two married individuals, glorifies God in everyday, mundane and common ways that are expressly human and not bound by gender or sexuality.

If you choose to follow Christ’s lead in these ways as you enter into marriage, regardless of your gender or sexual orientation, your marriage will glorify and honor God.  It is for that reason alone the Christian faith demands that we support same sex marriages fully.